One of the advantages or blessings of private prayer is that it is a safe, private place for confession and sorrow over our sins. And we do sin; we blow it; we fail, right? If we tell ourselves that we don’t sin, then we make ourselves a liar and the truth is not in us (I John 1:8). We know that our God knows our sins, failures, and mistakes. He knows those that we are going to confess and He knows the sins that we are not even aware of committing–the sins of omission and commission. Our loving heavenly Father wants us to come to Him and share our shame and regrets. He wants us to know that in His presence is full acceptance and mercy–bought by the blood of Jesus Christ. He has already forgiven us. Judgement for all our sins have already been dealt with for all eternity (Hebrews 10). There is only comfort, restoration, and peace for us when we open our souls to our heavenly Father.
What about confessing all our sins to others? Does the Bible tell us to do that? Help us out, Thomas Brooks, our puritan pastor.
Consider that in secret we may more freely, and fully, and safely unbosom our souls to God than we can in the presence of many or a few. Hence the husband is to mourn apart, and the wife apart, Zech. 12:12–14, not only to shew the soundness of their sorrow, but also to shew their sincerity by their secresy. They must mourn apart, that their sins may not be disclosed nor discovered one to another. Here they are severed to shew that they wept not for company’s sake, but for their own particular sins, by which they had pierced and crucified the Lord of glory. In secret, a Christian may descend into such particulars, as in public or before others he will not, he may not, he ought not, to mention. Ah! how many Christians are there who would blush and be ashamed to walk in the streets, and to converse with sinners or saints, should but those infirmities, enormities, and wickednesses be written in their foreheads, or known to others, which they freely and fully lay open to God in secret. There are many sins which many men have fallen into before conversion and since conversion, which, should they be known to the world, would make themselves to stink, and religion to stink, and their profession to stink in the nostrils of all that know them.
Yea, should those weaknesses and wickednesses be published upon the house-tops, which many are guilty of before grace received, or since grace received, how would weak Christians be staggered, young comers on in the ways of God discouraged, and many mouths of blasphemy opened, and many sinners’ hearts hardened against the Lord, his ways, reproofs, and the things of their own peace; yea, how would Satan’s banner be displayed, and his kingdom strengthened, and himself infinitely pleased and delighted! It is an infinite mercy and condescension in God to lay a law of restraint upon Satan, who else would be the greatest blab in all the world. It would be mirth and music to him to be still a-laying open the follies and weaknesses of the saints.
There is not a sin that a saint commits, but Satan would trumpet it out to all the world, if God would but give him leave. No man that is in his right wits, will lay open to every one his bodily infirmities, weaknesses, diseases, ailments, griefs, &c., but to some near relation, or bosom friend, or able physician. So no man that is in his right wits will lay open to every one his soul-infirmities, weaknesses, diseases, ailments, griefs, &c., but to the Lord, or to some particular person that is wise, faithful, and able to contribute something to his soul’s relief. Should a Christian but lay open or rip up all his follies and vanities to the world, how sadly would some deride him and scorn him! and how severely and bitterly would others censure him and judge him! &c. When David was alone in the cave, then he poured out his complaint to God, and shewed before him his trouble, Ps. 142:2. And when Job was all alone, then his eyes poured out tears to God, Job 16:20. There is no hazard, no danger, in ripping up of all before God in a corner, but there may be a great deal of hazard and danger in ripping up of all before men.
There are times and reasons to confess your sin(s) before one another, and there are times and reasons to confess them only before God. We must be wise with whom we share our weaknesses and sins. Do you have a spiritual confidante, someone to help you with accountability? Is there someone you feel safe with to be real and vulnerable? Is there someone you can count on to find encouragement and to pray with? A jewel is such a brother or sister to one’s soul.
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Brooks, T. (1866). The Complete Works of Thomas Brooks. (A. B. Grosart, Ed.) (Vol. 2, p. 173). Edinburgh; London; Dublin: James Nichol; James Nisbet and Co.; G. Herbert.
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